Out of the Mouths of Babes

I am sure we have all heard the phrase "Out of the Months of Babes comes gems". Well at 51 years old I can tell you that is very true. Not long ago we were on vacation with our oldest and her family (Jess and Robert and Sam) in California. We were able to spend a week with them and it was great. We had a wonderful time getting to know Sam again and just being able to hang out with him was great (oh and it was nice to see his mom and dad).

Well, during our visit someone, I think it was Grandma Cathy, said to Sam - You Be Happy. No he will point to you and say "You Be Happy" as if you had no choice in the matter. I have to tell you that is wonderful. To see him say that and to understand that we are the ones that make the decision to be happy or not.

We can let the situation decide what our out look is going to be or we can determine that we are going to have a positive attitude about it regardless of what is going on. Or not, we can decide to be in a bad mood because we aren't getting what we want or we are not gettin our way in life. What a long and painful life it would be if everytime we had a reason to be in a bad mood we were in one.

Well, next time you feel like life is getting you down and need to be reminded. Just picture a little 2 year old pointing their finger at you and saying "You Be Happy Papa Man" you will smile (it helps if they call you papa man).

"You Be Happy Papa Man" - Samual Miles Payne 2012.

A whole new you.

I am married. I state that up front so you will understand what I am going to say next. As a married man I try and give my wife what she whats (yes that is what all husbands do - right?). So this year when I asked her what she wanted for Christmas she stated that she wanted to not only continue to go to a personal trainer (she has lost a lot of weight and looks wonderful) but that she now wants me to start going with her as well.

You can imaging my horror at hearing that she wanted me to get up at 5am in the morning and spend the first 1-2 hours of the day working out in a gym. So now the rubber hits the road. How do I try and give her what she wants and still avoid working out.

Well after much thought and encouragement from friends and family I decided to agree to a personal trainer. So we are starting another adventure. This will be the year of ME 2.0. I hope to lose a lot of weight, improve my back so that it will stop hurting and in general make life better.

There are several factors that have help me make this decision however the two at the top of the list are when your wife, who you love very much, asks that you get healthier so you will be around a while you kind of have to change your ways and second is when you hold your grandchild in your arms you think that you want to be around for more of this.

So we have already been twice and I have lost 1.5 pounds, so the race begins. I am not looking at this as a New Years Resolution, as they seem to be too easier to drop, this has got to be a major change in my life to have any long lasting affect. So wish me well.

It is not necessary to change.  Survival is not mandatory.  
W. Edwards Deming

You Find What You Are Looking For

Wow, I heard this the other day and it has been running around inside my head every since. What a wonderful world this would be if everything you looked for you found. No more lost keys, pens, socks (you know that one that seems to disappear in the dryer), true love.... That would be wonderful. However that is not what it means. It means whatever you look for in your life, you will notice it above the other things.

If all you look for is the bad things in life such as "my car always seems to break down when I need it most" then guess what? It will appear that you are correct because your brain will register that once again you were right.

Well, if this is true that you find what you are looking for, maybe I need to change what I am looking for.  I know I left a bag of corn chips around here somewhere.....ok maybe I am taking this to simply. I need to decide to look for positive things to happen in my life, then my brain will be conditions to start to notice when positive things happen. "I seem to find good deals while shopping Christmas" - I know I need to think bigger but I have to start someone.

The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible
Winston Churchill

Why is it hard to commit?

Why is it that we make a decision to do something, we have every intention of doing it, we think about doing it, we plan to do it....but in the end we somehow don't get it done. Well that is what this blog has been for me. I want to do it, I think about what I should write, but I don't get it done.

Well, let's see if we can change that. I am going to try and write something at least once a week and see how it goes. That is only 52 posts, I should be able to find the time to write that many. Goodness knows I have that much stuff floating around inside my head. I hope the good stuff finds it way to this blog.

Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought. 
Henry Bergson

The first Re:

Ok, I have started the first of Re's. Redesign. I now have a membership to a good gym (Gold's Gym) and hope to redesign my body. I need to change my level of activity and diet. I will be changing not only what I eat, but how I eat, and when I eat.

Why is it that we know what we should do, but for some reason we don't do it? I have read plenty of books on weight loss, diets and how to feel better overall, however when it comes to doing it I seem to lack direction or if I do try something (and it works) I get bored pretty quick and stop doing it.

I smoked for a while in my life but when I decided to quit it was not hard for me. Yes I know for some it is very hard if not impossible, but for me I was able to put down the pack and never pick it up again. Food on the other hand is not so simple. I still have to eat so it is not just a matter of going with out food until the urges pass (that's called death).

So I am going to once again try to eat only turkey, chicken, fish and vegetables for the next 5 weeks to see what that does. I will be taking supplements to help and going to the working out every day in some fashion.

In the future I will be talking about some other Re's like refocus, rethink, reinvent....... change is in the air, and it is great.

When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have!  We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty. 
Woody Allen

Introducing the New and Improved.....Me.

Ok, a little confession to start the ball rolling, I gave up watching TV for Lent and failed. Yes that is right I was unable to go 40 days (or so) without watching TV. But as I sit here thinking about it I can tell you that while I was not watching TV I got more things done. I explore more ideas in my head (I should apologize for some of them).

I am sure that I am like most people and have a long list of things I want to do, a list of things I need to do and a short list of things I actually get around to doing. I need to change that around. I need to get more things off my list, as I am not getting any younger. I turned 50 last year and when I look at what I have left to do on my list I start to get a panic feeling like I am late for the bus back in school.

So with that said, I believe it is time to "Re". Reinvent, refocus, reinvest, redirect and repossess my life. I need to start thinking of what is really important and stop wasting time doing what is not important. Spend more time talking to my loved ones instead of just hoping they know I love them. Spend more time on projects that are going to better the lives of those around me, instead of just mine.

Maybe if I refocus my attention to others around me, I will reinvent myself. I wonder what ME 2.0 will be like? Will I still like comics, space movies, comedies....  I don't know but I am kind of getting excited about what new adventures might come my way. My only hope is that the new me, weights less than the old me.

The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning. 
Mitch Albom

Brings Me Back

Ok, they say you never forget your first and I am here to tell you that is true. I remember my first as if it was yesterday. I remember watching her for a long time and wondering how I was going to get closer to her. She seemed so far off like she did not even know who I was.

I spent months planning the right thing to say, to be in the right place at the right time and practiced in front of a mirror. I still remember how she looked and wondering what it would feel like having her in my life full time. We would talk to each other, learn to love each other and basically complete each other's life.

It took a long time but like most boys I finally got up the nerve and moved forward on my quest. I can not tell you the trill of being alone for the first time. The lights were down low, the room was quiet except for the sound of my beating heart. I reached out and for the first time I touched her and she responded to me. I was scared but determined to keep going I pushed the enter key. Thats right I am talking about my first computer which was a Commodore Vic 20 (little brother to the Commodore 64).

I just read today that they are coming out with a new version of the Commodore 64 that looks like the old model but has a new high tech computer in it. This is great, same look and feel but with a new insides.

I may have to buy one, if I can get my current love to let me have one of my old loves back.

I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past
Thomas Jefferson

Way to Go Page

If you know anything about Google's start you will know who Larry Page is. He was a co-founder of the company. Larry teamed up with  Sergey Brin to create the basis of what is now Google. One of the best decisions that they made in the early days was to bring someone else on as the CEO. This was due, most likely, to their young age at the time. Well it has been long enough and now he is taking back over as CEO of Google.

No one will ever care about your baby the way you do. I think it is a great idea and just what the company needs to shake things up.

Too many of us let our dreams be run by someone else when we have the ability to run it. We had the idea in the first place and I think there is a reason that that happens. Sure sometimes we need help in getting the idea up and running but it is still our idea. So if you have an idea that you are working on, don't be afraid to ask for help, but dont let someone else take it away from you.

So, I say Way to Go Page. (Oh and if you are hiring let me know).

"An idea that is not dangerous is unworth of being called an idea at all"
Oscar Wilde

Hello, again

Well, here I am again looking at my blog and wondering why I have not written anything in a long time. I guess I have been busy. Scratch that, I know I have been busy but maybe I need to find the time to share my thoughts. I know that sometimes I feel like if I don't express my opinions that maybe I will explode into a rambling idiot (well lets hope more rambling and less idiot).

So that being what it is I am going to try and write something at lest 3 times a week. I have some ideas on what to write about but those, like a lot of things, are subject to change at any time.

"Fasten your seat belts, it is going to be a bumpy night" 
Bette Davis

Sam

Well here I sit writing this while my grandson is asleep. My wife and I were very happy when we got the call from the kids asking us to come help fill the gap between when the baby was born and when their scheduled day care would kick in. I told everyone that we had been "called up to the majors" to explain why were heading to California.

Sam is wonderful and is a blessed addition to the family. We now have 2 grandchildren (Cady and Sam) and it great being a grandparent. Now mind you I did not think that was going to be the case. I started out not sure if I was ready to be a grandparent, was I old enough? was I smart enough? Turns out you become a grandparent even if you are not ready.

When I look at my grandkids I can't help but think about all of the things that are going to come into their lives. the joys, the sorrows, the highs and the lows. In less than a minute I am transfered from tears of joy to the sadness of thinking that someone out there is going to hurt this kid. I am not talking about the hurt of being hit, or assaulted physically, I am talking about getting hurt emotionally. To me that is the pain that will hurt the worse, when we have to explain why a friend lied or said something that hurt there feelings. I can only pray that there will be more Joy than Pain in their life.

My father used to tell me that if he had known that grandkids were so much fun, he would have had them first.  I could never understand what he was talking about, until now, If my dad were here today, he would have even more fun with his great grand kids.

Our grandchildren accept us for ourselves, without rebuke or effort to change us, as no one in our entire lives has ever done, not our parents, siblings, spouses, friends - and hardly ever our own grown children.  ~Ruth Goode 

Wandering Around

I am traveling for work, as a matter of fact I am writing this from my hotel room.  It has been a while since I have traveled this trip has been a great learning experience. The conference I have been attending is great and I have met a lot of great people.

I have learned that I am not a real big fan of trying to do real work on my netbook. I like it for small things, but if you have to do a lot of work, it really is just too small.

I have learned to always travel with an umbrella, it has been raining for 2 days here and no end until tomorrow sometime (maybe). Today I walked about 15 blocks in the rain and was pretty much soaked by the time I got to the conference.

I learned not to give up watching TV for Lent if you are going out of town and will be sending your nights in a hotel room. You can only read the Guest Dervices Directory so many times before it is really sad.

So as you can see I have learned a lot, which brings me one of my favorite quotes of all times. I heard this a long time ago and it has stuck with me.

Not all those who wander are lost
J.R.R. Tolkien

What Should I Be Doing?

I am sure that I am not unlike a lot of others when I say there are times when I wonder if I am doing the right thing. Now I don't mean am I doing the proper thing or not being "evil" kind of right but am I doing what I should be doing with my life. I have not been watching TV for the last few weeks and as you would guess I have some free time that used to be taken up by the mind numbing box in the corner of the room. So I have had plenty of time to think about what I am doing and if I should be doing it.

There are plenty of test you take in school that tell you what kind of job you should have or what kind of skills you should be using, but what about the rest of your life? Is there a test for that?

What is it that keeps us from doing in life what we want? One study says it is fear that stops us or that we are boxed in by the thoughts, feelings, hopes of our family, spouses and friends.  So without even realizing it we let those around us decide for us what we are doing, why do we do that? Unless we are completely honest with those around us (and I don't believe we really are with most of them) they will not know what we really should be doing.

What would you do if did not have to worry about what others thought or what you were afraid of? Who could you be if everyone around you cheered you on to success?

Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today. 
James Dean

Having it All like Jesse James

I think we have all wondered what it would be like to have it all. To not have to worry about money, house payment, food, will your children have what they need and life in general would be great. Or would it? Lately you can’t pick up the newspaper without reading something about Jesse James or Tiger Woods and how they have pretty much screwed up their lives. What really bothers me is that most people look at them and think they had it all, they reach the top, and they should be looked up to.

Well, apparently not! Why in the world would anyone lookup to someone who can’t honest with the one person on earth they should be (their spouse in case you did not know who I was talking about).  Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t care if Jesse is a Nazi or if Tiger has some kind of illness that makes him unable to be faithful, they are just guys. Just like you and I only they found a way to make some money.  There is nothing special about them in any way that would make me think I should be like them or better yet that my children should be like them.

We need to change the way we think about "having it all" because if that is what having it all means, I say no thanks. 

That's the key to having it all: stop expecting it to look like what you thought it was going to look like. 

Cindy Chupack

Spring Is In The Air

Well, here we are once again at the beginning of spring. A time when we look to get out of our cabins and break free of the cabin fever that has infected us for the last couple months. I, for one, am not looking forward to all of the yard work that will need to be done (maybe it would be nice to have a couple more weeks of snow).

Spring is also the time of spring break. When young people get together and party like they have been locked up for a decade. The amount of booze consumed this time of year is incredible.

• The average man drinks 18 drinks a day
• The average women drinks 10 (come on girls you need to work harder)
• 50% of men and 40% of women say they drink until they passout or get sick. 

Wow, that is a lot of drinking, but what does drinking lead to? Well, children of course. Studies show that almost 50% of men who have more that 5 drinks (4 for women) report that they had unplanned sex and 52% said they had unprotected sex (does that mean the door was not locked?). Which means that not only could they end up with a kid, but they could have the gift that keeps on giving Herpes. 

So if those numbers have scared you into not wanting to go party like you have no tomorrow, you could always come to my house and do yard work.

Spring is nature's way of saying, "Let's party!"
Robin Williams

Any Fool

I have recently come to realized that I am a cynic. I have joked about it for years, but I am a cynic. I don't know how I got here. If I look back over my travels I don't see any real signs that indicated if I turned here I would end up where I am today.

So to change I guess I first have to determine how I got here in the first place. Is it the TV I watch? There does seem to a lot of shows that are very cynical in nature like the Cobert Report or The Daily Show, maybe that is where I caught it from. It could be in the newspaper I read, the letters to the editor are usually very full of emotions that can be considered cynical. As I am writing this I am listening to "Things that make you go hummmm..." That is not going help.  It must be coming from somewhere, I wonder if there is a 12 step program for people who are trying to break the habit?

Well, I am going to try and work at being positive about life, family, friends and work. I am sure that if I just give it some attention then I will be able to do it.......yea right that will work.


Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain...and most fools do.
Dale Carnegie

Aretha Had It Right

I think Aretha Franklin may have had it right, it is all about respect. Why is it we sometimes find it hard to respect others? Is there something in our nature that just does not allow us to notice others around us. Have we grown so unaware of what is going on around us that we just don't have the ability to show simple honest respect?

Now I would love to tell you that I always show respect for people around me. I can tell you that I try, sometimes harder than others, but I try. We as a whole, it appears, has found that it does not matter if you give anyone some respect. We ignore people who are waiting on us in restaurants, or checking us out at the store. That is until one of them makes a mistake and then they be come the center of our attention. I try and always greet the people who are there to help me and make my life easier. You would be surprised how many time someone will brighten up just by asking them a simple "How are you today?" when it is normally their job to ask you.

But I am not just talking about respect to those people around you for just a short time during the day, how about the people you are around all day. You know the people you work with. We need to remember that they deserve to be treated the same way we want to be treated. So unless you want to be talked down to, or ridiculed in public, maybe we should not do that to others.  I know what it feels like and I can tell you that it is not one of my favorite feelings, so I am going to try and treat people with respect, how about it care to join me?

Men are respectable only as they respect
Ralph Waldo Emerson


All I am askin' is for a little respect....
Aretha Franklin

Working for a Thanks

I had an interesting moment today, you know one of those moments that stick with you all the day though. I was doing something for someone and their friends. Now I did not start out thinking that I wanted to be thanked for what I was doing but I came to think that it would be nice to be thanked. Well, after saying something like, look what I did for you, the response I got was "I did not ask you to do it". Wow, there it was right in my face, here I was doing something for someone else and instead of getting thanked I got slapped.

I did not know what to say at first. It would seem that I had to rethink my motives as to why I was doing what I was doing specially in the light that it was not asked for and now apparently not appreciated.  So instead of getting angry and saying things that would cause a fight, I simply finished what I was doing and then left the room to think.

Ok, what was my real motive? Was I working for a thanks or did I have a higher purpose in mind? I still am not sure, but I think I will have to think twice next time to find out what I want out of my actions. I would love to say that I would only want to do it for the pure motive of just trying to help someone. But is it wrong to want at least some kind of appreciation? There has been plenty of things I have done for others behind the scenes where they do not know it was me and I am ok about not being thanked, why is it sometimes we feel the need to be thanked?

Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul.
Henry Ward Beecher

I Love A Good Deadline

What are deadlines and why do we have them? That question comes to mind every now and then since my life seems to be made up of deadlines. If you look up the word deadline you get "DeadLine: The point in time at which something must be completed". That seems right at least that is how we look at deadlines today. Of course I found that is also means the line that if a prisoner crossed they would be killed. Maybe that is where the stress comes from with deadlines, the fear that if we don's finish in time it will kill us. I wish I had not found that part of the definition, now deadlines will bother me even more.

A good friend of mine gave me a plaque for my desk that reads - Deadlines - the Ultimate Incentive. Is that really the case? Why do we put deadlines on ourselves? More importantly why do we let others put deadlines on us? It is bad enough that I have to put up with my own deadlines, now I allow others to give me their left over deadlines that they are not using.  I am very bad at putting deadlines on myself. Just about everything I am going to do I have some kind of self imposed idea of when I should be finished. It does not matter if it is doing the laundry (yes I do the laundry sometimes) or doing something at the church I put my self under stress by coming up with some kind of crazy deadline. Well, I think I should stop doing that but then again...I do love a good deadline.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
         Douglas Adams - 1952-2001

Back into the grove

Well, life happens and brings us around to what is really important. So that being said, I am back and will be posting more to this blog. I hope you enjoy the new commitment.

I know you’re not going to understand this, but….

My dad, who happens to be the owner of this little blog, used to say this all the time, it would infuriate me. It made me feel like such a dumb ass. “I know you’re not going to understand this, but that’s gonna be hot” he’d say after I touched a hot pan. With my wounded finger in the in my mouth (something about my saliva has healing powers) I’d hang my head in shame, or so he thought. Really I was just lowering my eyes so I could roll them at him without him seeing, he hated that. He would use that phrase in all sorts of my less then intelligent moments. So it surprised me the other day when I used that very same phrase myself, but I said it in my head. Now I can see its appeal. I was walking through the weight room in my gym I saw two, not one like normal but two, guys wearing flip-flops.

“I know you’re not going to understand this, but you could lose a toe” I really don’t understand this trend. Are you too cool/sexy for proper shoes? It’s a gym not at Right Said Fred song. That is just as bad as the men who stand around by the equipment just to look “hot”. With their tight shorts and oddly hanging tank tops, they just confuse me. Or the women you see wearing a ton’o make-up and froofed up hair. Isn’t the point of going to the gym to work out, to sweat, and to stink? Not to pick up on or be picked up on. I have a wonderful idea, and if I can find financing for it, this idea will solve this annoyance of mine, and I highly doubt I am alone on it. I will open a fake gym. A pseudo-gym if you prefer. It will look like a gym; you won’t be able to tell a difference by walking in the door. But pick up a weight and you’ll see the point here isn’t to work out. In fact sweating will not be allowed. Our weights will be made of Styrofoam, our machines of plastic. The treadmills won’t work either, and the Stairmaster- for decoration. This will set the perfect scene for all those flip-flop wearing non-workouter workouters and lingering picker-upers. That way they can get out of the gym and let the rest of us, serious about fitness, get back to work and be less annoyed.

If you are interested in backing this I-can’t-believe-someone-hasn’t-thought-of-this-yet idea, please contact me. Let’s get the ball rolling!